battle of egos

the last one standing with a beating heart, wins.

leila's sonho

minha mãe sonhou que eu tava gravida
"mamãe, to gravida e não sei o que fazer"
"traz pra cá que a gente cuida"
e ela disse que nunca tinha sonhado com isso
e disse que acordou tão triste quando viu que era só um sonho

gente se eu aparecer gravida por aí não será mera coincidência ok?

ill be looking through your eyes

All my goodness
(I'll be looking through your eyes)
(I'll be looking through your eyes)
All my goodness to show
(Why are you so far from saving me?)
(Why are you so far from saving me?)

(never again)

somos tanto das coisas que morreram, num processo de constante reciclagem; você me enterra morta lá no fundo, e aos poucos vou arrumando outra forma de viver, desintegrando-me no interstício de você, deixando ir o que tiver que ir, se algum dia te menti, já foi embora, se te machuquei, foi embora, foi embora porque morreu, e aos poucos o que sobrou de bom, porque sempre sobra meu amor, é só questão de separar bem o lixo, aos poucos vai sendo reabsorvido pela tua pele que já não me estranha tanto, lentamente jogada nas correntes que circulam por ti, passeando, passeando, até que um dia me veja de volta a superfície, talvez numa qualidade que adquiriste, talvez numa simples gota de suor, não importa tanto, seja qualidade ou simples gota, você vai se olhar num reflexo de qualquer coisa e o susto será um sorriso, e um leve toque sobre mim, seja eu o que for, você vai sorrir sabendo que sou eu, e partirei esperando a próxima vez, se é que haverá uma próxima vez, não sei quanto de bom ainda resta em mim para ser usado, mas meu amor, como você fica linda em tons de saudade, como eu te fiz melhor que a mim mesma...

play as you go mobile phone

sempre achei que eu ia ser a loca da turma mas
olhando bem
tem piores

barcelona pt 1

three days on the couch drinking
and i took that plane to meet you up in barcelona
three hours with the seat belts fastened
it took me all i had,

took the metro,
you wouldnt tell me your address,
but i had to see you,
took a nap
at the benches of miros park

i had fifty euros and nowhere to go
i had fifty euros and all the courage in the world
but you were sorry
and busy

sixteen hour bus ride home
with the tickets you bought me
sixteen hour bus ride home
limping back with nothing to say

baby

i miss cigarettes more than i miss u

hey dr strangeluv

looking everywhere i see nothing but people

NO FEELING IS FINAL

“Let everything happen to you

Beauty and terror

Just keep going

No feeling is final”

llll

acredito que não há vida sem um protagonista,


em dias assim eu tenho tanto medo, tanto medo,
a vida na rua parece um segredo
que eu não sei
em dias assim eu não sei, eu não sei
só lembro que você saberia
como é não saber

e porque vc nao despela as mentiras e olha pra mim e me vê
olha pra mim e me vê

eu sei o quanto você se odeia
pelo jeito que você olha pra mim e se vê
olha pra mim e se vê


a porta disse
volta
eu disse cala a boca
e bati

a boca disse
volta
e eu bati
e bati

tree of life

your love
it fucking hurts me,
corrupts me,
but i come from the seeds
from the root
of a tree so big
way before you were born

you're probably breathing air i made and you dont even know it

the tick of my heart is a countdown

time bomb

the heart is the most dangerous muscle
the heart is the most unreliable muscle
unpredictable muscle
the tick of my heart is a countdown


and when everything explodes i hope to catch a glance of your arm flying in the air


no CPR, please
when my time comes rememeber no CPR please
dont try too hard
its not worth it
the heart is the loneliest muscle
because nobody wants it

it's a long way,

it's always a long way
for people like you and me

a mala vai embora leve, mas não vazia
(mas ainda tenho a mão que carrega a mala, você joga suas mágoas fora mas volta com as mesmas mãos)

elas não param nunca, elas não esquecem.

wasteland

so many lies, so many lies,
capture them, burn them,
but please dont you wear them too
it breaks my heart


cant you see what you've done to my heart?
its just a wasteland now
cant you see what you've done to my heart?
its just a wasteland now

"she was too wild"

ok you said goodbye,
im just saying that im still saying
goodbye
too

maria, the problem is that you feel too much

well, nobody said a thing when everything was on fire

...

i dont want to love less
just maybe share it better

just some more things
to love
to buy
to remind us gently
of everything thats missing
like bread,
water
&

anti acids
(too many heartburns lately)



- ive heard crazy people tell stories about other crazy folks as if they didnt realize they had one or two screws missing themselves,  blind shit -


heartland
why cant i just describe to you the things i feel everyday,
the thoughts i think everyday,
the pills i take everyday,
i have everything,
like, i had everything,
and i wasnt happy baby
never
baby


- people on the street walk at their own pace and for the hurried, time is a battle -

nothings gonna hurt you baby

mommas got all your fears in a jar

nonsense

wish I didnt have any feelings so I could hear you better
these sweaty palms
got them looking like springs the day i got hand tattoos
dripping
sweat-staining everything
the prints of fear
like a trail of paws left by the tiger
that sleeps behind your ears and whispers
"you're not gonna make it"
every
morning


but you know better, you can tell when they're in the zone
you got the best highs and you know it
and they know it
and everybody knows everybody
and everybody knows everything
you can almost see their faces waking up tomorrow, alarm clocks, cafeine,
avoid the mirror,
avoid the mirror,
car, manhole,
you wish youre super mario
you hope for the end of this level,
avoidance and sleeping pills
so you

-

radio static
alarm clock

easy

senile skies
white and constantly seeming as about to fall
down
but
not enough to forget

city bones are too weak
and I've been treading hard
forgive me i was lost but now it seems i found the way
is it jesus or waze?

these days they really make you wonder
who's inside this white skull
who's behind that white wall

looking for a manhole in this mind of mine
swear I saw your face on the ground
right next to a dime

easy,
brain, heart, lungs
and your 72% of water just iced
easy,
remember to forget
the heart is the loneliest muscle
barb breathing

history is so old
I'm glad it doesn't have a skin

too late

yeah life's full of shit and most days are repetitions of worse versions of yesterday
but i can't help but feel sometimes I'm having one of the best days of my life
and I won't know it til it's gone

like a bullet it just goes right through you

if you hold a stone

segurei uma pedra e fiz um talismã
porque ali precisava de fé
aleijei-me de tudo que não estava
manquei, fez falta um joelho para andar,
aprendi a voar, deixei de ver e aprendi a enxergar,
maria, quando o aço caiu do céu como pequenos cometas de haxixe
tudo ao teu redor se destruiu menos você
e você era a única que rezava pra ser alvo
de uma nova história qualquer

na distância que fiz, regando a vapor um conjunto de pedras, regando de água e sal uma planta, criei um deserto e chamei de cama,
depois, no chão rachado, desenhei duas mãos e chamei de cuidado,
e de tão mal pensado, nunca ninguém se aproximou
pensando sempre que era um aviso
e só era amor.

depois da festa a gente volta pra casa e aleijo-me novamente, as 3:30 da manhã, fazendo um chá na cozinha pra Caetano cantar pra mim,
e a pele derreteu
depois caiu
e da carne branca nasceu outra carne
que eu chamei de maria, assim baixinho, quase sussurrando
porque para os outros era um acidente
e pra mim era eu.



destruir não é o mesmo que derrubar para refazer
nasceu uma asa 

my king

love is never love when it's new, pure and clean
before the red eyes
the purple wrists
peel-off skin


love before the storm is a law
and whatever lasts after the biting and chewing and intimate destruction
bowels ripped
swollen sockets
after the things you swore you would never do
that, my queen, is the choice that deserves the crown
and everything before is the sleeping pill before surgery,

never flowers at the recovery room.

lead poisoning

you taste metallic

your abdominal pain

your chronic fatigue

you came in through the water pipes and i've been sick since

your heavy presence

you're lead poisoning me

and we know it

a lembrança

que acorda a cárie, que acorda a artrite,
que dói

a handshake of carbon monoxide

no alarms and no surprises please

thin eyelids

two hundred and seven thumbs up, two hundred and seven hands crashing against each other just to let you know how much appreciated you are, we love you,
in your dreams the spotlight follows you around the kitchen, to the shower, in the backseat, in your dreams you are blinded by light and we love you,

and every wall is made of a succession of open windows and doors that always have someone to announce, you are never alone, you are never forgotten, everybody wants your opinion before changing the clothes of the plastic mannequin,


eyes covered by a skin too thin, the eye has to breath through useless plumber eyelids
it's all we get at night

asylum

it was a moment where you remembered everything at once, it was as if your heart was like a headphone in the ears of a deaf old lady who's got alzheimer, the notes played a picture where yoou got stabbed by love,
twice in the chest and one in the guts, iridescent bruises, a headstand and then a dive back into dank forgetfulness,
the hand had five fingers and three popped veins, a plastic catheter, bandages and red meant things were in the wrong position,
grey curtains and then too much light, darkness and then bliss, grey curtains bleached by too many discussions where you had reason but you were never happy.

blonde girls

and you, you thought i would die
but all i did was walk away
enjoy the shadow of another day
drink from an empty glass of memories

and you, you thought i would dehydrate
from all the tears i wept in rage
i told you all about the room where
i kept the facts that never happened

i told you so many times about how many times i had survived that i bet you bet it was a lie